Moving Too Fast

Moving too fast,
Yet, afraid to move at all.
Possibilities arise,
Or, are they just unchecked fantasies?

Desperate desires and,
Fears of getting too close,
Cloud my thinking.
A storm is brewing.

Play it cool;
Don’t slip – watch the risk.

Beautiful eyes;
Smiling, shining
Predator eyes;
Watching, waiting.

Hidden fantasies die with unspoken words.

Waiting eagerly for each shared moment,
And what is yet to be discovered.

Waves crash on the beach,
Bringing doubt and hope,
Swirling together in the sand;
Only to be drawn back into the waiting sea.
Leaving nothing;
Loneliness,
Emptiness.

Can’t cry – Don’t try.
Fall back inside.
Put on the mask.

Moving too fast,
Can’t see the signs,
The twists, the turns.

It’s raining now,
A storm is here.
Feel the power.

Feelings rage with the wind.
Shoved to the back,
Closed in the closet,
Hidden for none to see.
Hope lingers.

It truly is a world of misery.
We should be happy and free.
Do you feel me?

I wish I could say,
All the things in my head,
Forever going ’round,
Never getting’ said.
And, with every passing day,
My love just grows more.

I can feel your stares;
I hear the unspoken messages.
But, I don’t know what they mean.
I can’t help but wonder;
What are you thinking?
What are you feeling?
Do you feel as I?
What lies behind those eyes?
Do you have scars deep inside?

Show me that smile;
Stay with me,
Just a little while.

A dog chases his tail,
Forever going ’round,
Getting dizzy – falling down.

Why can’t we control our dreams?

Waiting again.
For what, I don’t know.
It’s not your fault.
I’m such a mess,
I just wish,
I could care,
A little less.

Longing for your presence;
For your touch I so rarely feel,
For your love I wish was real.

Maybe in another place,
In another time,
With no one watching,
No one judging;
Things could be different
Speed might not matter.

Reality sets in;
Like a bugs ass against a windshield;
Back to this world,
This moment,
This reality,
A reality of confusion,
Delusions and subterfugions;
Where hot and cold run back to back;
Changing without warning,
Leaving me hanging
On faith and half-said things,
Imagination dominating,
Taking off on flapping wings.

Fear has become my friend,
Talking to me every day.
Gripping my tongue;
Stopping me from expressing how I feel;
Stronger than the eyes that watch;
Stronger than the ones that judge.
Left Ignorant,
Not knowing;
Your mask in place.

Moving too fast,
Or not moving fast enough.
Maybe I’m on the wrong road altogether;
Maybe you’re just hiding;
Hiding from the eyes,
Hiding from your self.

You are beautiful.
A small flower in a field of weeds;
Enticing with your necter,
Driven by instinct,
Me the bee.

What to do?
What to do?

Move mountains.
Words issue forth from tender lips,
Actions are tendered;
Not what’s expected;
Not what was said.
The storm is raging,
It is cold – bundle up.
But still, the chill wind will find it’s way in.

I’m at a loss.
The pendulum swings.
Games are played;
Rules are random,
And I can’t stay away.

Dinner is served;
All is forgiven.
The game plays on.
Pressure is building,
No release in sight.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder;
Bullshit!
Absence makes the heart grow lonely.

There is no love;
Lost years ago,
Unable to penetrate the mask.
Speed never mattered;
We never left.